Every time the rapture doesn’t happen they seem more convinced that it will happen in the future.
I really should get into the property market around the time the next rapture announcement comes out because surely they’ll be selling all their houses off right. If you timed it right you could go on a really expensive holiday and save money by not paying for a return flight.
Faith is such an interesting concept. Believers can make up interesting statements like this, but if this statement is true, then so is the following: God was okay with Epstein’s activities, otherwise God would’ve intervened. Right?
What if the rapture did happen but none of them were worthy?
Oh, please no. I so desperately want humanity (and the planet) to be rid of these people.
Then the muslims take their place
explains a lot tbh.
Wow, covid was an extremely shitty rapture.
Christians are almost always been selective about what parts of the bible they believe (or even bother to read) and this is an easy example. The bible makes very clear that the date the world ends will be known to none but god. There won’t be a warning from angels and humans won’t be able to figure out in advance. There could be signs it’s coming that people pick up on but someone saying “it’ll be this day on this month” will always be a lie. That aside, why would a Christian who thinks the world is gonna end sell anything? What will you do with that money in Heaven?
That aside, why would a Christian who thinks the world is gonna end sell anything? What will you do with that money in Heaven?
it’s all carnies and rubes.
Even Jesus, who is God, sorta, didn’t know when it would happen. He told his disciples he would return in their lifetime.
From what I understand this is a common misconception
He forgot to convert from God Time to mortal time. He was thinking they would live another couple dozen years or whatever, a thousand times as long as it took HimDadSelf to create the universe and speedrun evolution. Forgetting those the same kind of Days.
Sell car.
Donate to church.
GGEZ
Church: no re
That aside, why would a Christian who thinks the world is gonna end sell anything? What will you do with that money in Heaven?
They must not think Trump is releasing the Epstein files any time soon.
Well…on that front, they wouldn’t be wrong.
I wonder if the inverse would hold true
If somebody “knows” its the rapture, then it must not actually be the rapture
Pretty sure it is a time when it’s least expected
You do realize Christianity is pretty diverse group, right?
You can believe what you want to believe
If you hold a single text to be the very word of your god, and you use it to justify all that you do or do not do, then you must follow it to the letter or admit that you’re just a tourist. There is zero in between when you claim that the thing is pure and divine, cannot be questioned, and should be the basis for all your laws.
Christians just keep throwing out whole chunks of the fucking thing except all the parts that they can misinterpret and mistranslate to allow them to do awful things to people they don’t like for “reasons”.
If you hold a single text to be the very word of your god
Which not all Christians do. There are many who believe to be the words of human beings, just divinely inspired or significant.
My favorite part is how every pastor and many laypeople will have their own particular set of interpretations. Never mind that, at most, only one of those could be fully right, and therefore the rest are doing/believing some things wrong.
Diverse, sure. But some statements hold true across most of that diversity. Almost every Christian individual and denomination is selective about what parts of the bible they listen to. Since some parts of the bible are contradictory, this is sometimes a necessity. But other times it’s just people being people.
I’m gonna write a book that contradicts itself, not give clarification on those parts, leave it up to the readers to figure it out, and base the afterlife on how right they were. Because at least some Christians think they are doing it exactly right, and they will not be having the afterlife they think they will.
You left out “pick the correct translation of that book”. There are people who are ‘KJV Only’ who believe that the King James Version of the bible is the only correct divinely inspired version.
American Christians. Never heard anyone else use the term rapture.
The article mentions the preacher who started this rapture excitement is from South Africa
I mean that really all depends on the religion that they are. The rapture is used in different context for different religions and it’s not always called the same thing. However the word rapture is typically prevalent among sects such as Southern Baptist and any of the other evangelical faith. But it’s not typically found among many of the base Lutheran religions and the exact words as well as Catholicism.
In the UK, some Christians have used the term “Rapture” to just refer to the second coming. I’ve heard people use the term and not even know Rapture Theology (where Christians just disappear) to be a thing.
I mean Jesus could release the files himself hes all powerful no?
Yeah but he doesn’t know how to use windows 11, so he’s just going to print out an email and send it in the post.
He’s about to release the… Look squirrel!
Jesus is coming! Open your mouth!
Swallow the sins of man
Jesus works for those in power so therefore he’s protecting them, that’s the only answer to this.
That’s Supply Side Jesus, the one Evangelicals worship. He’s a dick
But is he powerful enough to create a rock so heavy that even he can’t lift it?
You know what? Sure. As long as they have a reason to release the files I’m down to support it.
I think if this idea were seeded into the Facebook frenzy that would have been diabolical
Weird…
According to the Bible no man, no angel, not even Jesus Christ himself knows when the rapture will be…
Huge fan of whoever convinced them to blame it on trump not releasing the Epstein files tho.
There’s no such mention of the rapture at all in the Bible. It was invented in the 19th century.
It was invented to distract us from the Trump/Epstein files
Esoterica channel on YT is a bit over halfway through a lecture series on Merkavah, that talks about apocalypse predictions and the language used and why (which by extrapolation applies to occult topics and language used).
“Life was filled with guns and war,” the song begins, “and everyone got trampled on the floor. I wish we’d all been ready.”
Wow, sounds like we’re already living it today…
What about the 12000 from each of the 12 tribes?
“Clearly, when he wrote with his own hand that no man would know the day or the hour, the Lord wasn’t counting on a genius like me coming along.”
- a whole shitload of different preachers
Joking aside, how do whole congregations avoid seeing the narcissism on some of these motherfuckers?
The ones that could self selected out. (Or were kicked out.)
But surely it won’t happen until after God sees those files. They might affect who gets raptured. /s
Theyre not going to be in the rolls anyway
Somewhere, one single person was raptured and wondering where everyone else is. No one else noticed their absence. But the rapture did happen.
“Just me? Really?”
The one raptured dude was super high on fent so they assumed it was an OD.
This happened in AD 221.
small gods was right all along
The rapture happened ages ago, but none of us went to heaven. We’re staying along for the ride.
Because it’s impossible to be good, in the words of Eleanor Shellstrop: “There’s this chicken sandwich that if you eat it, it means you hate gay people. And it’s delicious!”
I’m sorry but Chick-fil-A is bland as fuck and I’ll never understand why people love it so much. The chicken is always dry, the sauce selection sucks, and the lettuce & tomato are always warm & soggy. I just don’t get it. Even by fast food standards, the quality is shit. I’ve been to multiple locations and they’re all the same.
It’s too bad there’s only one fried chicken restaurant in existence
Simply do this for every product you buy, or go to the Bad Place.
I feel like you can keep track of the ones actively doing genocide and famous for it when they’re just one franchise instead of a megaconglomerate that makes everything under two hundred different labels.
Go to Popeyes instead of getting in line with the rest of the WASPs, it’s not a big ask.
And then the probing began.
Yes Lot, just don’t look back, or I’ll kill you.
Release the Trump/Epstein files
Needs a bigger font. I want it seen from space. Like the great wall of china.
*disclaimer: not actually seen from space. terms and conditions applies. all rights reserved.
Nice try.
The Rapture did happen, and you failed to make the cut.
Actually, this is something I could relate to.
This is hell. Like, literally.
I was raptured! Or at least I think I was. I was laying in bed when all of sudden everything started shaking and there was a bright light outside. Everything in my bedroom started being lifted up. Then two shadowy figures were in my bedroom. They were short and large heads. They spoke like Biblical angels, completely in tongues.
The next thing I remember, I woke up two towns over with no memory. I also have a pounding headache.
Oh yes I remember that Pixar short!
List of dates predicted for apocalyptic events
If the definition of insanity is doing the same thing and expecting different results, then the people who anticipated this latest failed prediction are absolutely, frothing at the mouth, street corner screaming certifiable.
But then I think we all already knew that.
checks list Cool, the one I added (and documented) is still listed.
In 2011 one of the skeptic magazines published a form saying something like, “I hereby bequeath all my worldly goods to the bearer of this note on [day after the world was supposed to end].” Obviously a joke, but I wonder how many doomsday-ers were confident enough to sign on the dotted line?
I doubt many because you never, ever, hear of any of these rapture folks giving away all their money and stuff. never. Oh it’s going to happen…but just in case…
Not quite the same, but when my wife was a kid, some of her hardcore fundie neighbors ran up MASSIVE loan and credit card debts on the lead-up to one of these rapture dates in the '90s. They thought that since they would soon be chilling with Jesus in Heaven they wouldn’t have to face financial consequences. It financially ruined them and they lost everything.
Well, we’re getting close though. Only 5 more left.
Imagine you wake up in the morning and realize all the annoying Christian fundies have been raptured away and the world is all unicorn farts and rainbow cotton candy for a while…
Death cult makes up another excuse for their god not existing.
“We know it’s fiction, but we hate you for not believing our bullshit!”
Fuck religion, and the religious. Even you ‘good’ religious assholes. Fuck you specifically for supporting evil religions.
Without religion, we’d be talking about Epstein right now. REligions come along with the complete lies and just fuck everything up. Every fucking time.
Without religion we’d be raping children and bashing babies against rocks, and possibly genocided each other several times over.
72% of Americans have some form of religious belief.
If religious people fuck everything up you are literally surrounded by them.
“Some form” is pretty broad. They may not actually mean all religions, either.
But I don’t think that raging against the majority is uncalled for.
There’s a difference between raging against the majority, and saying things like “all 72% of the population do is fuck everything up”. It’s a wonder anything is standing if that was the case.
I mean
It kind of is a wonder anything is standing.
Indeed. Feels like there must be a flawed premise involved…
Without religion, we’d be talking about Epstein right now. REligions come along with the complete lies and just fuck everything up. Every fucking time.
saying things like “all 72% of the population do is fuck everything up”
That’s not really what they said, though. Most of that 72% does non-religious stuff most of the time. Imagine how much better things could be if we were less fucked up!
Ok…then we’re surrounded by people who fuck up the planet.
Hey, you DO see that humans, and only humans, have fucked this planet up pretty badly, right?
Like we’re already past the point of no return for climate change. We can’t unfuck the planet.
So why is it hard to believe that the majority of people are huge fuck-ups in life? Including you.
Hey, you DO see that humans, and only humans, have fucked this planet up pretty badly, right?
I never claimed otherwise?
And how helpful is it to scream “fuck humans, all they do is fuck everything up, even the so called good humans fuck you for supporting the humans fucking things up!”
There, have I fixed climate change now?
Pretty sure bad people don’t need religion to still do bad things and lie. I’m pretty certain murder and other such horrors existed before religion did.
Which is to say, y’all would be still talking about Charlie Kirk, tariffs, etc still instead of Epstein.
A large portion of American Christians I’ve talked to reject Trump being a Christian. They just preferred him over Kamala. They’d rather someone pretending to be Christian than flat out reject Jesus openly.
